World Record Holder?

I once was a world record holder. Yes you read it right. Me who has never set the world alight was the best in the world at something. I bet you’re guessing what feat I excelled at and many of you will assume it’s an eating world record.

Most pies in 3 minutes or baked beans with a cocktail stick. You’d all be wrong. I was a world record holder at Nintendo Golf. The year was 1991 and I had one of these beauties.

A Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) and for me still the greatest gaming machine ever to have been produced. Tetris, Mario Brothers, Micro Machines, Slapshot (Ice hockey where you could have a good punch up), Nintendo Tennis and Golf were the games I’d always play, each with varying degrees of success. 

But it was Golf that was my favourite. Hours I’d sit at my desk trying to hit a pixelated ball into a pixelated hole with a pixelated stick. And boy did I get good at it.

Being a bit of a geek I used to buy the official Nintendo magazine as they had a high scores section (no internet back in those days). I noticed one day that some spotty American kid held the world record for Nintendo Golf at 16 under par. I was regularly finishing a game on 14 or 15 under par. This record was well within my grasp.

Then one Sunday evening it happened. I remember it being a Sunday as my brother Rory kept telling me to hurry up and finish as London’s Burning was about to start. 20 minutes before Bayleaf, Sicknote, Josie and the others came onto out 14″ colour portable I was 14 under with 4 holes left. It was on.

I can’t remember the exact layout of the course or what I did on those last 4 holes but I remember finishing on 18- par. I’d beaten the world record by 2

I was ecstatic. Dancing round the bedroom shouting at Rory to get the camera. To register the score I needed to take a picture of the screen and send it to Nintendo for publication in the magazine. I took a picture on our trusty camera and then another random dozen or so pictures of our cat just to fill the film up.

Tuesday was my day off so I headed to Boots to get the film developed. I handed in the film and parted with 7 quid. the fella said they’d be ready in a week.

The following Tuesday I picked up the photos and there it was a picture of my portable tv with the screenshot of my world beating score.

I then had to post the picture with all my details to the Nintendo magazine office in Japan. An then wait…………

Two months passed by and my picture never appeared in the magazine. I was still the record holder but had no evidence to show the world.

Then one day my world fell apart. I received a letter from Nintendo. They thanked me for my picture and congratulated me on my record. Then came the but………….

…….but we can’t recognise it in our magazine as there is a glare on the photo that when we transfer to our printer doesn’t show the score!

I was devastated………

No official world record for me!

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